Criminal Law with a hint at Torts
"Hello there, sucker!, with a hand gesture people in their right minds would find offensive, my friend greeted me on a chilly Sunday morning, to which I replied "I will get you on defamation, slander added" with a fat smile on my face. We shook our hands, this is when I had a musing "well, what I just said could be real you know? All I need is my friend's address and his phone number, there'd be no chance the court not entertaining my complaint..." the very thought made me day dream. What you will read further are recollection of my day dream.
The
experiences you've had to a great extent gives shape to how you are. If what I
have learnt in the past four years at the law school is to be interpreted as
experiences I have had, I tell you it has shaped me into a being who weighs
every breath taken, figuratively of course. Shake hand with a person, but make
sure you shake it well whatsoever their sex be, for sexual harassment
provisions applies to both men and women equally in principle, crack a funny
joke that involves your bodily organs, the same problem. When you are chatting
and visiting a dirty website at the same time, be supper cautions before you
click any links for section 47 of Electronic Transaction Act can greet you with a
hefty fine, prison sentence added.
Every sip of the cup of tea you drink at 'dai's
pasal' you hardly can think of any other thing than the provisions relating to
Tortious liability on the newly enacted Muluki Civil Code, for the tea never
satisfies your tongue, sometimes it's hot (these times worse for you remember
the hot coffee case where the court decided around 3 million in compensation to
a burn victim who spilled coffee on her crotch) and sometimes its cold or
without sugar.
Dealing
with a break up, being a male (emphasis added) is a nightmare; it's obvious
that couples today indulge in a physical act or two once they are in a
relationship, which turns out to be a trap the reason being one, pessimistic
attitude of human beings and the next, limitation of most forms of sexual offences is a
year; furthermore, 'The Honorable Supreme Court' has established a ratio that 'penetration
alone is not the only ground for rape'. Belonging to the third gender doesn't
help either (if you are thinking of it), because there is another ratio, 'a
female can rape another female'.
Getting
into physical brawl over an issue with your arch enemy form the law school is
limited to your dreams, 'moral turpitude', 'medical expenses', '35 days in
detention' and thoughts as such occupies you before you can raise your hand to
strike, by then you'd already have become best friends with your enemy. Don't
even think about carrying a weapon to the college, for the first thing being
'fear of expulsion from the university' and the other 'being prosecuted for
unauthorized possession of weaponry'. Not being parts of brawl doesn't help
either, for leaving crimes unreported makes you a secondary offender punishable
by lesser degree of punishments.
Whatsoever,
there are always better parts too. Say you get accused of a mischief, you can
drop the 'burden of proof' bomb at times like those. You can always shut the
one adjudicating your mischief up with 'audi alteram partem', a Latin scrap for
fair trial. Real legal issues are less a problem also, because most at the law
school can draft a writ of habeus corpus or threaten the cops of doing so,
which gets you out of minor trouble in no time, making law more fun to study.
